Impulsivity
by Releina Artemis Rockefeller
Summary: Impulsivity. The tendency to do something reckless, to do something without thought. Literally, to do something on impulse. That's how she would explain how they ended up this way. [Rated T for language and themes; inspired by the songs of Lorde] Chapter 2: Ribs
1. Bravado

_**DISCLAIMER:**_I do not own everything that is in Cowboy Bebop. It rightfully belongs to Shinichiro Watanabe. I also do not own "Bravado", the song that inspired me to write this story. It rightfully belongs to Lorde. If you wanna know the song (and I suggest you listen to it while you read this), just type this link in your browser (just delete the spaces in between): bit . ly / 1kfFozp

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><p>Stuffy.<p>

That's all that she could describe the air right now in the Red Tail.

She punched a button on her dashboard and turned the radio on. A familiar song reverberated in the small space that was her craft's cockpit. It was an old song she knew so well.

_All my life  
><em>_I've been fighting a war  
><em>_I can't talk to you or your friends  
><em>_It's not only you  
><em>_My heart jumps around when I'm alluded to  
><em>_This will not do_

She floated in space momentarily. With her craft on autopilot, she leaned back and adjusted in her seat.

She exhaled with much frustration. Well damn, that hurt.

She flinched at the bleeding gash on her abdomen, right on top of her diaphragm. As she acknowledged that pain, she began to feel all the other wounds on her body. Various scrapes, cuts, and bruises on her arms, legs, and nicks on her collarbone and face.

She was grateful for three things: her courage, her agility, and her strength. It was those three things that made it possible for her to get out alive. Although the courage, she had to say, half of it was borrowed from alcohol, a quarter from the adrenaline rush, and the remaining quarter from her determination.

She was on a mission.

And she was hell-bent on wanting—no, **needing** to not fail this one. She didn't want to fuck things up again. She wants to return to Bebop with her head held high. Especially when this was her first solo mission.

Oh yeah, speaking of alcohol, she still has half a bottle of rum left. She took the first half before starting the mission and left some just in case there's a cause for a (very) small celebration with herself.

She pressed hard on the gash on her abdomen to prevent it from stretching. She gently bent over a bit to reach for a compartment under her seat where she kept that rum. She hissed as the wound stung, partially reopened blood-clotted areas, and started bleeding again. The pain was all worth it in her mind; for in her other hand was the bottle of rum she so wanted.

She quickly opened the bottle with her bloodied hand and immediately downed the liquor like it was just water. After such, she closed her eyes and sighed in relief. She let the bottle and the cap drop to the floor.

_Cause I was raised up  
><em>_To be admired to be noticed  
><em>_But when you're withdrawn it's the closest thing  
><em>_To assault when all eyes are on you  
><em>_This will not do_

_Oh, oh, oh, oh  
><em>_Oh, oh, oh, oh  
><em>_Oh, oh, oh, oh  
><em>_Oh, oh, oh, oh_

She felt the pleasant burn in her throat, the tingles crawling to her fingertips and her toes, and her body warming up. She could also feel several wounds and bruises were numbed thanks to the sudden rush of alcohol.

That's all she needed right now. She wanted to feel. Anything. Panic, determination, triumph, and most of all, warmth.

Her fingers gently tapped to the rhythm of the song. It reminds her of a pleasant memory. It took her back to that day, months before the accident that fucked up her life, when she and her college friends went to a concert of the artist singing this particular song. Oh how much she had fun then.

This is the upside of regaining all her memories. Remembering how good her life was. The downside was realizing what good life had slipped away from her hands because of the accident. A life she couldn't get back.

Who would've thought that she would be so poor, so buried in debts, so promiscuous, so violent, and…and so desperate?

"Mom and Dad would be **so** proud," she smirked in sarcasm, but frowned, "I miss you, Mom, Dad. I didn't want things to go this way, too."

At the back of her mind, how she wished she could've died in that accident instead. It would've spared her of the miseries that she had to endure today.

She smirked again, "My own folks probably want to teach their daughter a lesson. They've spoiled her rotten. So they decided to shove her into poverty and forced independence."

But in her mind, she chastised herself that that wasn't true. She remembered how much her parents loved her, how they'd always want only the best for her. She knows that her parents wanted her to live. They probably couldn't bear the thought of their most beloved daughter dying. They probably just didn't know that she would end up so far into the future that none of her relatives were able to keep track of her…or maybe none of them would even remember that they had a frozen family member.

Why was she thinking of all these things?

She smiled and sang in time to the music, _"I'm faking glory. Lick my lips, toss my hair, and send a smile over, and the stories brand new. But I can take it from here. I'll find my own bravado."_

To find her own bravado.

In her new lifetime, nothing really mattered to her anymore. She decided to choose to live a dangerous life. Morbid as it may sound, at least, if her time comes, she went out while trying things she wouldn't have done before—things that would probably make her parents faint just at the thought of it: wearing clothes that leave nothing to the imagination, smoking, drinking, fighting, gambling, flirting with men but never really sleeping with them.

Nothing mattered. No one mattered—not even herself. Until one day, she crossed paths with the one who, unintentionally, made her realize things.

Spike Spiegel.

He has this effect on her. She can't really put her finger on it. There was a force pulling her to him. She was drawn. When she realized this, she tried her best to stay away from them—the reason for her disappearances from Bebop. This is all new to her.

She decided to finally just slow down and try to make the most out of her new life with some friends. He made her realize that the past didn't really matter, but the future does. She realized that he made sense. What's the point of running away when there's nowhere really to run to? Might as well make one.

She was so absorbed into sorting out her life that she never noticed that Spike wasn't really there. He was in a dream. He was trapped in his dream. And so when he chose his fate and marched to his own death, Faye felt like her life was falling apart again. She felt like she just found her resolve but only to slip away just as quickly. She was not ready for that. No, she would not let this go.

_It's a switch flipped  
><em>_It's a pill tipped back, it's a moon eclipsed, whoa  
><em>_And I can tell you that when the lights come on I'll be ready for this_

She didn't want to continue to wait for a corpse. She finally found someone, a companion to somehow help her lighten the weight of her life's load. She wasn't going to let him go out like a light. Even before her mind could fully process the idea that had entered her mind, she was on her feet.

After crying her heart out for a few minutes, she gave Jet a quick goodbye and assured him that she will be back, but might as well prepare some medical stuff. Better yet, ask Doc to get his ass in the Bebop ASAP. There was gonna be a medical emergency. Jet, baffled, was about to question her, but Faye took a few things with her and broke out in a sprint to her Red Tail, with Jet limping as fast as he could behind her in an attempt to stop her.

She was quite thankful that Jet was injured. Otherwise, he would've very easily pinned her down on the floor and then cuff her—just like how she was when she had first set foot on the Bebop. Jet would've guessed what was on her mind at that moment—she was gonna chase Spike.

She decided to live dangerously, didn't she?

She was a bounty hunter after all. She was gonna bring back Spike, dead or alive. The former was fine, but the latter would be a rather exquisite icing on the cake.

And so here now is Spike, bloody and lying on her lap.

She found her own bravado.

_It's in your blood stream  
><em>_A collision of atoms that happens before your eyes  
><em>_It's a marathon run or a mountain you scale without thinking of size_

Impulsivity. The tendency to do something reckless, to do something without thought. Literally, to do something on impulse. That's how she would explain how they ended up this way. Spike decided to just suddenly take down the syndicates and kill Vicious for good. Faye decided to chase after Spike, because in her mind, she would not forgive herself if she just stayed back at the Bebop and cried her heart out.

No. Faye Valentine had always been known as a stubborn shrew. Might as well live up to it.

"Fuck you, Spike. Fuck you." She told him, "I went through hell in there. You wouldn't have made it to Vicious if I wasn't there on your tail, you fucktard."

Spike never noticed that there was someone else in that building, trying to subdue the syndicates. He wasn't able to take them all down completely, for his ultimate goal was to kill Vicious for his Julia.

In his mad dash to the top, he didn't notice that he was being chased by other syndicates—those who weren't fully subdued. There were more than what he could've imagined. Well, maybe he never noticed at all because Faye took care of them.

Faye had to admit, Spike was pretty damn good at single-handedly trying to take down the entire building full of disciplined but bloodthirsty syndicates. Well, most likely because he was once also a disciplined and bloodthirsty syndicate. That thought gave her eerie chills.

_I was frightened of every little thing that I thought was out to get me down  
><em>_To trip me up and laugh at me_

Debris were flying everywhere, even towards her direction, grazing her once immaculate skin. And in a thick cloud of smoke, she wasn't able to detect one predator. She received a stab on her abdomen. However, as soon as she felt the cold blade pierce through her skin, she was able to kick the guy away from her, preventing further injury.

She leaned on the wall momentarily and tried to catch her breath while an arm draped over her gushing wound. Her legs were shaking from all the running, climbing, kicking, jumping, but most of all, even her own knees threatened to betray her from the excruciating pain her body was taking.

But this is not the time to give up, no. She wasn't a quitter. She had her own mission to fulfill.

_But I learnt not to want  
><em>_The quiet of the room with no one around to find me out  
><em>_I want the applause the approval the things that make me go_

_Oh, oh, oh, oh  
><em>_Oh, oh, oh, oh  
><em>_Oh, oh, oh, oh  
><em>_Oh, oh, oh, oh_

When she reached the top, she was just in time to see Spike standing up and walking down the staircase, staring up the sky, and then he collapsed.

Her heart stopped at that moment. Her aching body momentarily froze in place. All the pain in her body numbed. Her mind screamed at her to move. And move, she did. She sprinted towards him and tried to wake him up.

She was panicking, but it was a good thing that her mind was more determined than shaken with the entire predicament. She activated her Red Tail's remote control system and set it on autopilot to come through the blasted roof of the Red Dragon Syndicate's building. Then, she removed her red jacket and pressed it hard against the deep wound across Spike's torso.

She also checked for pulse and breathing while waiting for her Red Tail. Both were faint. But they were there. She could also hear several footsteps. Well, some syndicates just didn't want to die in either Spike's or Faye's hands eh?

_It's a switch flipped  
><em>_It's a pill tipped back, it's a moon eclipsed, whoa  
><em>_And I can tell you that when the lights come on I'll be ready for this_

Finally, Red Tail just arrived in time. With the remaining strength and adrenaline in her body, Faye hooked her arms under Spike's shoulders and dragged him with her into the cockpit. She had to get away before she deals with first aid. And so, her Red Tail zipped as far away as it could from Mars, firing two missiles back at the building while she fled. Touché.

Faye took this time while in Mars' orbit to inspect Spike's wounds. She had stashed a first aid box from the Bebop before she left and it was apparently a good call. She made careful but quick work on his wounds, removing debris of all sorts and sizes, cleaning them with bottled water, and then applying antiseptic. After the bandages ran out, she tore his trench coat into strips and used it to dress his wounds.

_It's in your blood stream  
><em>_A collision of atoms that happens before your eyes  
><em>_It's a marathon run or a mountain you scale without thinking of size_

She checked for pulse and breathing again. They were a tad bit stronger now than they were a while ago. She sighed in relief. It was something. But he still needed serious medical attention. He lost a lot of blood and she knows that she was only able to temporarily slow down his bleeding just in time to get back on Bebop.

Faye cursed under her breath. That Jet better be ready.

Her hands were shaking from the adrenaline aftermath. The pain settled back in her body. She felt so exhausted. Then, encoded the coordinates of Bebop, set the craft on a fast but steady speed, and then hit autopilot. She can't pilot right now. She wanted to rest.

In this moment of exhaustion, she feels old—not her age, but how times have changed. And certain thoughts make her feel scared, vulnerable.

_I was frightened of every little thing that I thought was out to get me down  
><em>_To trip me up and laugh at me_

"It's quite scary now, Spike, you know that? This day and age scares me," she whispered as she moved her hand to gently rake his unruly hair away from his face, "It's scary realizing that people I loved are long gone. It's scary realizing I have no more home. It's scary to realize that no one knows me and no one cares for me. It's scary how I should always have my guard up all the time and how I should be concerned for my own safety and survival. But…I found a new home, Spike. It's the Bebop. And I found new people that I care for, it's Jet, that kid, that mutt, and…and you."

Her hand fell limp and rested on the crook of his neck as she continued, "I understand why you decided to go. But I felt that I wasn't gonna allow myself to see you dead. Sure, I don't even know why I should still be alive. I found no meaning in living this second life, Spike. I am not afraid to die, even now. But after I met you and the crew, I slowly found meaning. It's not to discover my past. It's to live a new life. To have a reason to live. I wanted to protect you and the rest of the gang. You guys are my family now. I won't let anything bad happen again. Not until I die. I hope you understand."

She could feel her emotions surging through her and she hissed, closing her eyes. Big teardrops rolled down her face and onto Spike's forehead.

"Call it selfish, but I don't want any of you guys dying on my watch. I'd rather go ahead, Spike. I have nothing to lose anyway. You guys still have a chance at this…" she trailed off and laughed a bit, "Yeah, I'll be ready for your fucking temper once you realize you're still alive. I'll let you win. Just that once, okay? Can't let you beat my ego down."

_But I learnt not to want  
><em>_The quiet of the room with no one around to find me out  
><em>_I want the applause the approval the things that make me go_

"I wish we could just go back to the simpler days, you know?" Faye looked out and watched the vast universe outside her zooming craft, "Maybe…maybe it wouldn't have turned out this way—aaargh!"

She flinched at the gash on her abdomen. It was still profusely bleeding. The numbing effect of the alcohol was wearing off.

She closed her eyes again. She sharply inhaled through her nose and exhaled, hissing as she did so, "Shit, that really hurts." Tears rolled down her face again. Tears of both physical and emotional pain.

"If I could turn back time, I wish I didn't nag Dad so much to sign me up for that first commercial space flight. Then maybe, I would've lived to this day as a happy grandma watching her grandkids ruin her garden. Maybe I would still be rich, maybe I would've had a good and doting husband, and maybe I would've retained more manners. If only I could go back in time, Spike. Then maybe I would've lived a good life and maybe I would die filled with contentment in my heart. Also," she snickered before continuing, "you would be able to die as you wish. No one there to interrupt you from your reunion…with Julia. Oh God. I…I-I'm sorry."

_Oh, oh, oh, oh  
><em>_Oh, oh, oh, oh  
><em>_Oh, oh, oh, oh  
><em>_Oh, oh, oh, oh_

Faye realized that there was more reason as to why Spike wanted to die. He wanted to be with his Julia. She just had to ruin it. Didn't she of all people know how it feels like to lose loved ones? It should've been worse for him, to see his beloved get killed right before his very eyes.

She shouldn't have meddled with his business.

"Oh God. I'm so sorry, Spike." Her crying turned into breathless sobs, as the action made her wound twitch and she started coughing violently. She brought a hand up to her mouth and felt her own blood erupt into warm streams in between her fingers and down her arms.

She found it hard to breathe. She was tired. So very tired.

She closed her eyes and allowed herself to succumb into darkness.

* * *

><p><span><em><strong>AUTHOR'S NOTE:<strong>_ I just recently got addicted to the music of Lorde. I now have her album "Pure Heroine" and her EP "The Love Club". She is amazing. You guys better check out her music. It's awesome!

I got really hooked to "Bravado" and "Ribs" (according to a video, Lorde says that the latter is her favorite) and I was just taken beyond. It stirred my imagination and I knew that I just **had** to write this. So I did, sitting on my bed, and typing away on my laptop. I find the lyrics of both songs very befitting of Faye, how she wanted **purpose** in her life—to find her bravado. And at the same time, how she finds it crazy getting old with no time to even prepare for it. The songs have nostalgic vibes to it, so I thought about how Faye would have had wishful thoughts and other things reminiscent of the past.

You might be wondering, so where's "Ribs"? Well, it's on the next chapter. Surprise, surprise. ;]

I originally planned on making this a one-shot. But after I slept through the night (on the day I finished writing the original one-shot version of this), I thought that it might be better as a two-shot instead.

Please let me know what you think of this fanfic by giving me a review!

Thanks for reading!

Yours truly,  
>Releina Artemis<p> 


	2. Ribs

_**DISCLAIMER:**_I do not own everything that is in Cowboy Bebop. It rightfully belongs to Shinichiro Watanabe. I also do not own "Ribs", the song that inspired me to write this story. It rightfully belongs to Lorde. If you wanna know the song (and I suggest you listen to it while you read this), just type this link in your browser (just delete the spaces in between): bit . ly / N6KwZo

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><p>"Damn that woman! Where is she?!" Jet yelled in frustration at the Bebop's bridge as he tried to detect Red Tail on the radar.<p>

Jet groaned yet again as he plopped down on the chair and held his head in between his palms as if his brain was about to explode.

And it might, once Faye never returns in another three hours, he mused.

Then, the radar beeped and a blinking dot lit up on the screen.

Jet stood up abruptly, cursing under his breath as the pain on his leg strained because of the sudden movement.

The blinking dot on the screen was not Faye, however. It was another ship.

Then, the screen flashed with the face of a familiar friend. It was Doctor.

"Jet, I wasn't able to pack a few things and use my zip craft because as you've instructed earlier, I had to be there as quickly as I could due to a medical emergency. So I'm now bringing my mobile clinic. I got everything I need here. She's a tad bit bigger than Hammerhead. Got any parking space, old chum?"

"Plenty," Jet sighed exasperatedly and sunk back into his seat, his hand reaching down his aching leg and massaged it, "sorry for the short notice, Doc."

"It doesn't matter as long as you pay."

Jet groaned again. The price might be pretty expensive for this one and money had not come their way in a while.

Doc cleared his throat, "What's the emergency anyway?"

"No idea."

"What?"

"I've no fucking idea what those two kids had gotten themselves into," Jet half-roared, "They just decide to run off whenever they want!"

"Where's Spike?" Doc asked solemnly.

"No idea. He was looking for trouble before he left." Jet ran a hand through his balding head, "And Faye…I heard that woman sobbing just moments ago, and then she just said goodbye to me next minute, telling me to ask you to come here and be ready for a medical emergency."

"She sounds like she's looking for trouble, too." Doc said as he slowed down his ship and continued, "Open the hatch, Jet. I'm commencing docking sequence now."

Jet did as he was told.

A few moments later, Doc had joined Jet at the bridge and the latter discussed that had occurred not too long ago.

Then, the radar beeped again and a blinking dot on the screen appeared. The Bebop recognized the MONO system's signature as that of the Red Tail's—and so the name also appeared onscreen, pegged on a blinking dot.

Jet wasted no time and punched the connection to talk to Faye.

"Where the fuck have you been, Faye?!" Jet scolded.

No answer.

"Faye, answer me!"

Silence.

Strange, Jet mused. There was no visual of Faye. She was also not answering. The Red Tail has a unique and a more advanced MONO system. It has remote control capacities and it also has an autopilot mode. In which case, if the pilot was trying to get some good sleep but needed to be on the move, the pilot could just punch in the coordinates and never has to worry about not getting there.

While on autopilot mode, however, if any ships acknowledged by Red Tail try to make a connection with it, the speakers and the visual of the one who contacted Red Tail will be heard and will appear. However, the microphone and the camera on the cockpit will not be activated unless the pilot decides to do so.

So why wasn't Faye answering?

"Faye, stop messing around. This isn't funny!" Jet could feel his hands and feet turning cold.

"Faye!" he screeched. This time he stood up. He has a bad feeling about this one already.

No answer.

Then a visual appeared, but it was Red Tail's autopilot dialogue box. It informed Jet that it is now in docking sequence.

Jet's breath was caught in his throat. He opened the hatch, therefore deactivating gravity. Without a word to Doctor, Jet floated his way to the hatch. Doc followed closely behind.

Upon reaching the hangar, he saw Red Tail park perfectly in place. Jet reached for a lever beside him and closed the hatch, but he didn't reactivate gravity. Nope, not yet, he mused. He needs the help of zero gravity to get to Faye fast.

He floated to Red Tail and he froze at the sight of Faye and Spike inside, all bloody and bruised, and worst of all, unconscious.

"WHAT. THE. FUCK!" Jet yelled and made quick work to remove a tile panel near Red Tail's cockpit. Since he usually was the one fixing Red Tail whenever Faye gets it beat up, he knows quite a lot about it. Right now, he's trying to get to is its emergency open panel.

There was a small screen and a number pad. He punched in Bebop's ID, and the cockpit immediately opened.

Jet was absolutely horrified.

"Doc! Doc! Get your ass up in here!" Jet screeched as he reached in for Spike first so Doc could retrieve Faye afterwards.

Tiny spheres of blood bounced off from the cockpit, mostly were fresh from Faye's dripping mouth.

When Doc reached the cockpit and carefully lifted off Faye's body from her seat, he noticed that her body was trembling and that it was breaking out in cold sweat.

Doc's eyes widened as he saw the two tiny objects that clung on the skin on Faye's left side. Small, narrow, yellow darts.

Doc wasted no time and floated to his parked mobile clinic.

"Quickly Jet, we need to treat her first!" Doc told Jet while the former swiped his ID on the locked doors at the side of his mobile clinic.

"What?!" Jet exclaimed as he looked at Spike's bandages that were now heavily soiled with his blood, "By the looks of it, Spike here has a big slash across his tor—"

"Faye's been poisoned, Jet!" Doc exclaimed as he laid Faye on a gurney.

Jet gaped, "What?!" Boy, that's gotta be his word of the day.

"It's exactly what it means, Jet!" Doc spat, and began connecting Faye to a vital signs monitor, "Jet, I need you to put Spike there, on that other gurney. And then I need gravity around here. Then get back here. Stat! I mean, fast!"

The vital signs monitor started beeping in low and the intervals were few and far in between. Doc pressed the pad of his two fingers on Faye's neck and then on her wrist. No pulse. The red light on the monitor was telling Doc that she had just hit critical.

Doc groaned, "Shit! Don't die on me now, woman!"

"…_I don't even know why I should still be alive. I found no meaning in living this second life, Spike. I am not afraid to die, even now." _A memory of a hushed conversation echoed in his mind.

It was a powerful almost-death wish, more powerful than his own.

Spike opened his non-bloodied eye and turned his head to his side. He saw Faye, with her eyes tightly shut, skin pale, and blood staining her lips, chin, and neck. She had a tube in her mouth sucking out the blood and keeping her throat from collapsing and her airways clear.

Doc was frantic as he grabbed shears and tore off Faye's top. He tossed the shears on the tray beside him and charged the defibrillator. He waited for gravity to be put back on, and as soon as Faye's body had fully lain down on the bed and his feet were flat on the floor, Doc pressed the two charged pads on her bare chest. Faye's body jerked from the electricity administered to her. But still, the vital signs monitor made no marks of improvement.

"_Call it selfish, but I don't want any of you guys dying on my watch. I'd rather go ahead, Spike. I have nothing to lose anyway. You guys still have a chance at this…" _he felt the phantom teardrops on his forehead.

Jet ran back in the mobile clinic just in time when Doc recharged the defibrillator. Jet was about to touch Faye, when Doc warned Jet by saying, "Clear!"

Faye's body jerked again. But still no signs of improvement.

"Jet, her heart is slowing down and it's beating weaker by the second. She's about to flat line. I want you to put those big arms into good use and do compressions. Put your fists like this," Doc demonstrated and placed his hands on Faye's chest, right above her heart and said, "and push steady for 30 times, in equal intervals. Like a heartbeat. Understood?"

Jet didn't even nod. He just proceeded on doing so while Doc pulled out drawers and pulled out a capped syringe filled with epinephrine, "We need to get her heart back to normal before we give her the antidote for the poison."

"_If only I could go back in time, Spike. Then maybe I would've lived a good life and maybe I would die filled with contentment in my heart."_

"Faye…" it was a barely audible whisper from Spike's lips.

A flat line.

"No! Faye!" Jet shouted as he continued to do compressions. Doc threw the empty syringe on the bedside tray and recharged the defibrillator.

"Clear!"

A long beep.

"_Oh God. I'm so sorry, Spike."_

Spike breathed, "Wake up, Faye..."

Darkness.

* * *

><p><em>The drink you spilt all over me<br>__"Lover's Spit" left on repeat  
><em>_My mom and dad let me stay home  
><em>_It drives you crazy getting old_

Painful.

That's the first thing that was on his mind when he opened his eyes.

His eyes flinched at the light. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He reopened them to scan where he was.

It was all familiar to him. He inhaled the scent that was unique to it.

Bebop.

Aside from the clean linens that were underneath and around him, something was definitely off.

"Hey buddy," A familiar voice said, "glad to see you're up."

"Jet." His voice croaked, the sound of his own voice already foreign to him.

Jet snickered, "Yours truly. You've been out for two days.

_We can talk it so good  
><em>_We can make it so divine  
><em>_We can talk it good, how you wish you would be all the time_

"What…?" Spike spoke.

Jet raised an eyebrow, "What 'what'?"

Spike scrunched his face, "Where's Vicious?"

"He's dead. It was in the news. You really rocked that building, huh?"

"Then why am I still alive?" Spike sat up, hissing at the pain. The stitches across his torso still sore.

Jet gaped, "What do you mean by that, Spike?"

Spike closed his eyes, rage building up. He half-yelled, "It means I was supposed to die there, too!"

_The drink you spilt all over me  
><em>_"Lover's Spit" left on repeat  
><em>_My mom and dad let me stay home  
><em>_It drives you crazy getting old_

Jet sighed, "Somebody out there didn't want you dead."

"Tell me who!"

"Faye Valentine," Jet shrugged, "does the name ring any bell?"

Spike's eyes narrowed, "That bitch! How dare she meddle with my own business—"

"She's gone, Spike." Jet said, rather sorrowfully.

Spike's eyes shot open. The memory came rushing to him. The frantic but nimble hands that were making quick and careful work on his wounds. The sharp gasps of air and the struggle to breathe. Her pale face, the angry red blood that stained her once flawless skin. A flat line. A long beep.

"She got you here on Red Tail using autopilot. She was already critical when she got here. Doc noticed that she had two poison darts on her side. The gash on her abdomen partially damaged her diaphragm and breathing had become difficult for her. She didn't lose too much blood from that, though. She lost a very significant amount of blood when the poison spread in her body and she started vomiting blood. We assume that she had already started vomiting blood on her way here because when we found her, she was almost covered in it." Jet narrated.

_The drink you spilt all over me  
><em>_"Lover's Spit" left on repeat  
><em>_My mom and dad let me stay home  
><em>_It drives you crazy getting old_

Jet continued, "Her liver failed. Her kidneys failed. Those made her blood toxic. Her windpipe was about to collapse and blood had entered her lungs. She flat-lined. It's like she just went out there to get you and bring you back, buddy."

Spike was trying to take in all of the information. A hand automatically crept to his bandaged torso.

Jet noticed and he sighed, "She got it worse than you did. Doc said it wouldn't have been serious if she wasn't darted but…at least you got back, right? That's all she probably ever wanted. I mean, that's why she was out there. That's what she died for."

Spike felt his throat constricting. Something wasn't right. He felt as if he wanted to yell.

Jet reached for his bottle of beer from the foot of his chair and downed it in one go. He sighed, "Well, I'm sure that 'that bitch' who meddled with your business just decided to go on her own, eh? No need to get rid of her yourself. She just…she just walked out that door."

"Jet, stop," Spike bellowed as he placed his hand on his aching head.

Jet smirked, "She's a good-for-nothing anyway. She's just…shit. Yeah, a useless shrew."

Spike yelled, "Shut the fuck up!"

_This dream isn't feeling sweet  
><em>_We're reeling through the midnight streets  
><em>_And I've never felt more alone  
><em>_It feels so scary getting old_

Spike opened his eyes.

He was panting.

What the hell was that?

Was that a dream?

…or was it real?

He closed his eyes again and he tried to get a hold of his breath while his mind was trying to process everything.

"Hey buddy, glad to see you're up."

Déjà vu.

_We can talk it so good  
><em>_We can make it so divine  
><em>_We can talk it good, how you wish you would be all the time_

"Jet." Spike acknowledged.

"Yours truly. You've been out for two days."

This was getting uncomfortable. It's becoming so surreal—like he couldn't distinguish dreams from reality anymore. So Spike decided to change the flow of the conversation, "How'd I get back here?"

"Faye Valentine," Jet shrugged, "does the name ring any bell?"

Too surreal.

"…and where is she?" Spike hoped that the answer was not the same.

"She's gone—"

"What?" Spike didn't even want Jet to finish. His mind was playing sick games on him, wasn't it?

_This dream isn't feeling sweet  
><em>_We're reeling through the midnight streets  
><em>_And I've never felt more alone  
><em>_Feels so scary getting old_

"Ah geez, let me finish." Jet sighed, "She's gone to Mars, at the hospital where Doc's working. She's been there for two days. She flat lined for a bit when she got here. Apparently, she's been darted with poison. Although her injuries weren't supposed to be critical, the poison crept in her body while she was on her way here. Good thing that she switched Red Tail on autopilot."

"So is she okay?"

"Doc said she's gonna be fine. He said she's a hell of a fighter," Jet snickered, "For a moment, her heart just started to decline and she even flat-lined. But after about five minutes of attempting to revive her, she finally got back. Doc just administered the antidote and then got to you. He remarked that Faye made a good decision to do first aid on you; otherwise he would've gone crazy on who to save first. So he just stitched you up, hooked you in with a blood bag for transfusion, and it really didn't take a while. Then he took off, saying Faye needed serious medical attention. She needed to get her blood cleaned and transfused. And I got a call just yesterday and Doc said that her kidneys, heart, and lungs were already doing okay but the poison really beat up her liver. He scheduled her for a liver transplant a few hours from now. Luckily, she had a match at the organ bank."

_This dream isn't feeling sweet  
><em>_We're reeling through the midnight streets  
><em>_And I've never felt more alone  
><em>_Feels so scary getting old_

Spike felt relieved. And he hoped that this was real.

He hoped that he didn't have to open his eyes and be told that someone else had to die for him.

"Come to think of it, Faye was revived after you yelled at her to wake up," Jet said while he caressed his bearded chin.

"What?" Spike yelled? He couldn't remember yelling at her while he was down on a gurney and watching Faye across him as her life crawls out of her.

"Yeah, you yelled. You said, 'wake up, Faye!' And just like that, she suddenly took in a sharp breath and her heart started to beat. It was amazing, really."

He didn't yell that. He whispered that. Well, that was what he knew.

"And Vicious?" Ah, he just had to ask. He wanted to be sure.

"He's dead, Spike. You got him good. Man, did you shake up that syndicate building!" Jet snickered, "It's all over the news. And no one even knows that it was you…and Faye. She must be some good back up, huh?"

"_I went through hell in there. You wouldn't have made it to Vicious if I wasn't there on your tail, you fucktard."_

He smiled at the memory of her words, "Yeah, but I hope this one oughta' teach her to wear more appropriate clothes. If only she wore something else other than her silly excuse of clothing, then she wouldn't have been darted."

"Well, I'm pretty sure that the scars that'll come after this will make her reconsider her sense of style," Jet snickered, "Welcome back, buddy."

Spike nodded, "It's good to be back."

_I want them back (I want them back)  
><em>_The minds we had (the minds we had)  
><em>_Our thoughts (our thoughts)  
><em>_Move 'round their heads (move 'round their heads)_

Faye opened her eyes and flinched at the light. She raised her hand to block the light from her eyes as she tried to blink away the blur.

She caught the scent of cigarette smoke and knew that someone was beside her. Her throat was feeling parched, and she didn't care who was with her, so she croaked, "Water."

"It's about time, shrew."

She turned her head to the source of that voice and found a heavily-bandaged Spike, smoking and holding a glass of whiskey, and sitting on a chair beside her bed.

She dropped her heavy arm on her eyes and muttered, "This isn't exactly my idea of hell, you know. Speaking hurts. Water, please."

"Whiskey?" Spike pushed his hand holding the glass of liquor close to her face.

Faye slid her arm to do a facepalm and let out a groan, "No, no. I want water, lunkhead. Ugh. Never mind, I'll go get it myself."

She tried to stand up until she felt a strong but dull pain in her torso that immediately sent her flat on her back again.

"Fuck! What is this?!" Now fully-awake, Faye inspected her body and peeled the blanket away from her. She was wearing a hospital gown that opens in front and noticed that her torso was also as heavily-bandaged as Spike's. That, and she had several patches on her legs and on her arms. Not to mention that she was hooked to dextrose and something else, judging from the three IV bottles hanging on the IV stand near her bed.

_I want them back (I want them back)  
><em>_The minds we had (the minds we had)  
><em>_It's not enough to feel the lack (I want them back, I want them back)  
><em>_I want it!_

"Bandages, duh." Spike replied as he took a long drag from his cigarette.

"Thanks, Captain Obvious," she rolled her eyes, "How long have I been out?"

He blew out the smoke and replied, "Two weeks."

"Two weeks?! **This**," she pointed to her abdomen, "is just a fucking flesh wound, and I was out for two weeks?!"

"Yeah well, you didn't notice that there were two tiny darts on your side," Spike said as he crushed his cigarette butt on the ashtray on the floor, "They were poison, Faye. And it might not look like it, but you almost died. Your blood became toxic, and your liver shut itself down. You had a liver transplant last week. You're fucking lucky to be alive."

Faye took a moment for the information to sink in, furrowing her eyebrows, she just said, "What?! You've got to be fucking kidding me! Ouch! My throat hurts! Give me some goddamn water!"

Spike groaned as he walked into the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water for her.

He got back and handed her the glass. She took it and her hands were incredibly shaky and wobbly that the water in the glass threatened to spill. Spike grasped the glass and gently removed her hand from it, "Your muscles feel weird, don't they? Doc said you'll need a bit of physical therapy since you were out for two weeks. I'll do this."

He pressed the cold rim to her lips while his other hand cupped her chin and slightly tilted her head back. She instinctively parted her lips and he gently poured down the water down her throat. Once she had downed the entire glass, he set it on the table. He reached over her and covered her with the blanket she took off earlier.

Faye, suddenly conscious that she was almost bare to Spike earlier, was beet red, looked away, and sputtered her thanks.

_You're the only friend I need (you're the only friend I need)  
><em>_Sharing beds like little kids (sharing beds like little kids)  
><em>_We'll laugh until our ribs get tough (we'll laugh until our ribs get tough)  
><em>_But that will never be enough (but that will never be enough)_

He sighed, "You just woke up and you're already a nagger. Whoever said that people change after a near-death experience is a biased motherfucker."

"I've been asleep for years, lunkhead. I'm pretty upset that I get to sleep longer than a day." Faye rolled her eyes as she caressed the bandages that covered her stitches, "How long were you out?"

Spike downed his whiskey in one gulp as he continued standing, "Two days. Doc said I was just really exhausted. I got stitched up here," he pointed on his bandaged abdomen and continued, "Some bullet wounds, and other non-fatal flesh wounds. I did lose a lot of blood, though. You almost gave Jet a heart attack, you know? He said that when you left, he knew that he couldn't chase after you because of his bad leg, so he just immediately called Doc to visit Bebop and anticipate you…us. It was apparently a good call, because when Jet was trying to radio Red Tail, no one was responding. It was on autopilot. You passed out before you even made it here."

Faye sighed, "I acted on impulse. Because someone else did the same thing. It's good to know that I win some gambles. Too bad there's no cash reward."

"Yeah, and you still sing off-key."

Her eyes widened at that. So, he was awake that whole time?! "What did you just say?"

"I was awake when you started singing in your cockpit, yeah." Spike said and snickered, "Who wouldn't sober up after getting poked at open wounds that were also doused in water and stinging antiseptic?"

"S-so you heard…?"

Spike had on a gentler mood and nodded, "Your off-key singing, yeah. And your constant blabbering, yeah."

He sat on her bed. He noticed that her eyes were closed and her body was tense. He placed a hand on her cheek and told her, "Yeah, I was upset for a bit for not dying in there with Vicious. But then your words sank in. I understand you. You've nothing to be sorry about. If you weren't there, I bet that my ass won't even make it to Vicious to kill him. My only purpose was to avenge Julia's death. If it wasn't with your help, I wouldn't have been able to give Julia any justice. That was what I realized just a few days ago. As I told you before I left, I wasn't going there to die. But when I was there, I may have wanted to. As long as I take Vicious with me."

_You're the only friend I need (you're the only friend I need)  
><em>_Sharing beds like little kids (sharing beds like little kids)  
><em>_We'll laugh until our ribs get tough (we'll laugh until our ribs get tough)  
><em>_But that will never be enough (but that will never be enough)_

Faye opened her eyes only to see mismatched eyes staring back at her, and a smile gracing Spike's face, "This is rare, okay? Savor it. Thanks for the backup. Thanks for the words. Thanks for saving me. Thanks for all the shit you put yourself into just for me, and probably for Jet, too. That and…welcome home, Faye."

Welcome home. She stifled a sob at those words. **Home**. How lovely it is to hear that word and to actually feel that she really had one. Emotions surged through her and her hands crept to her face as she cried. She has a home. And she was home.

Spike pulled her in an embrace and soothed her back as she gave in and sobbed. She placed her arms around him and hugged him tight. She cried into his shoulder as her body shook with all of the emotions swirling within her.

Jet smiled as he stood in the doorway of Faye's bedroom and watched the two friends.

Well, that's what they are right now. Faye is still sorting out her thoughts, but Jet knows that Spike was special for her. She sees him in a different light, but maybe she still has not realized this herself, either. But the mere fact that she was willing to chase him to hell and bring him back in exchange for her life speaks in volumes.

And Jet knows, that deep down, something was also changing Spike. Jet knew when Spike yelled in the clinic, demanding Faye to wake up. It was like a mutual life force existed between Spike and Faye at that very moment and now as he was watching the two. It was something that Jet cannot explain.

Jet silently sighed and left the room. They need this time alone, just the two of them.

Them as a couple? It's possible, Jet mused. He's not going to protest. However, that's still a long way to go. Obviously. They both still have their own issues to sort through.

But right now, this is all that mattered:

They were home.

_That will never be enough  
><em>_That will never be enough  
><em>_That will never be enough  
><em>_That will never be enough_

* * *

><p><em><strong><span>AUTHOR'S NOTE<span>:**_ I know I mentioned in the A/N in the previous chapter that I plan this to be a two-shot. But I'm still contemplating on that. I'm currently working on a potential third chapter. And I have ideas for a fourth chapter as well. So this could possibly have four chapters. But with my schedule, work, and other stuff, I barely find the time to write, or the inspiration to do so. I am determined, however, that I'll try my very best to deliver four chapters.

Your feedback is always appreciated. Thanks for reading!

See you!  
>Releina Artemis<p> 


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